WalkTheLine wrote:

I just realized that INAT is my teammate in an ongoing tourney and I don't have him added as a friend. 

I'll have to fix that!

I don't engage in truces ..except those of the implicit type (We will definitely lose if we don't both attack player A), so I'm able to use my enemies list to single out players who are rude.  'Friend' is reserved for people who give my boards high ratings (just kidding).   Friends tend to be people who post in the forums and/or who engage in fun conversations in game chat.

If you violate the terms of a truce before giving fair warning/ the agreed on endpoint, you deserve whatever comes your way. That being said, I probably wouldn't make them my enemy just for one time.

On knowing who marked me a friend or enemy (don't be fooled, of course I think about this):

What difference would it make?

Knowing who put me down as an enemy? For most of us, we just rubbed someone the wrong way, or made a move that they misinterpreted. For a degenerate player or person, they are unlikely to understand all their enemies. "Those idiots," they'd say. (-)

Knowing who marked you a friend? Sure, mutual admiration is good for the soul. Would having anonymous friends be good? At least there's no such thing as being a 'bad anonymous friend.' Is there? It's not like you could forget to call your anonymous friend on their birthday . . . this could be a 'guilt-free' friendship, perhaps. (+)

One might actually lose more games with this knowledge. I look at the players to see who is strong or weak, and understand what they're likely to do next, but if I see someone has me as a friend or enemy, that distraction is information that can help me screw up my own strategy. (-)

So, two minuses and a moderate plus. I'll enjoy my ignorance.

I've enjoyed playing with everyone in this chat, some I've friended, and many I'm sure I would friend if I spent more time thinking about curating my friend list. We have had really exciting games and some small public/private chats that brighten my day. I treasure those times, I really do. If someone I admire joins my game or my team, wow, that makes my day. I guess that's enough for me.

As for truces, 1. I'm trying to follow Templaribus' example and never make them. 2. the best truces are unspoken truces, when everyone knows that they are needed for mutual survival. 3. If someone habitually misses the 'signs' that it's time for a small truce--especially in a 3 player game we're being crushed in--then I'd consider marking them as my enemy. ;)

It might be nice knowing who your enemies are, if you ever felt like trying to figure out WHY they felt that way, and even fix that. Not saying it's always going to happen, but . . .

It's happened to me when people think I cheated (didn't), but I was able to explain what actually happened, i.e. chess clock games, where no time is added per turn, so if you take long turns, you use up the time and get booted, through no real fault of your own. If someone with a short temper "enemied" me there, I'd want to know so I could explain - though I won't say no to a few free wins against people who don't check the clock specs. Is that wrong of me?

in my experience it's never a great idea to confront those that have marked you as an enemy. it rarely matters what your motivation was behind the action(s) that caused them to mark you in the first place. best thing you can do is be as genuine to yourself as you can be and be consistent. if it was a one-time thing that pissed them off they'll see in the future that it was errant. if they're inclined to consider that. if they aren't so inclined it doesn't matter.

plus, if you go premium, it doesn't even matter... :^)

I'm okay with not knowing who has me listed as friend/enemy. I see it as more of a personal note-taking function (i.e., I have multiple enemies in this game, do I want to join? I have this person marked as an enemy, should I trust the truce message?).

Making it a two-way feature feels more like a social media type of thing and I'm not sure if this site needs that.

erastus25 wrote:I'm okay with not knowing who has me listed as friend/enemy. I see it as more of a personal note-taking function (i.e., I have multiple enemies in this game, do I want to join? I have this person marked as an enemy, should I trust the truce message?).

Making it a two-way feature feels more like a social media type of thing and I'm not sure if this site needs that.

+1